


Private Messages better stay a secret

by graveltotempo



Category: Shadowhunters (TV)
Genre: Because its canon, Crack Treated Seriously, Gen, Originally Posted on Tumblr, gay sh brot3, gay solidarity is truly dead, group chats, im sorry? kinda? not?, raj wants victors d pass it on, victaj subtexts
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-01-29
Updated: 2017-01-29
Packaged: 2018-09-20 16:41:51
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,084
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9500510
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/graveltotempo/pseuds/graveltotempo
Summary: set after 2X03 in a timeline in which victor forgot to go catch jace bcause he was too busy admiring himself for being the best good looking clave representitive the Clave ever sent shoutout to the Clave





	

**Author's Note:**

> Originally posted this on tumblr and thought i'd share :) im slytherinsimon on tumblr

“I am so glad you are awake, Alec.” said Izzy, the moment Jace let go of his parabatai. She wrapped her arms around her brother for a few seconds, burying her face in his neck. “You scared me to death.”

Alec smiled at her. “I thought you said you were going to kill me.” He reminded her.

“I am working up the anger, you asshole.” Answered his sister, still not letting go of him.

“Well, I have the anger right here.” Stepped in Jace, shaking his head. “What in the hell possessed you to trust Jocelyn? After all she did-” he spared a look at Clary, who was still holding Magnus’ face and not meeting his eyes. “I mean…”

The red haired shrugged, finally looking up. “It’s fine. I am perfectly aware of how much my mother fucked up. I get it.”

“She did what she thought was right.” Told her Magnus, although he didn’t seem particular confident in his words or in favour of Jocelyn in any way himself. “And on that front, I owe Raj an apology.” 

Izzy was making faces at him from behind Alec, shaking her head repeatedly, but it was too late. And Magnus had no clue of what she was doing. Alec frowned at him. “Why? What happened to Raj?”

Now, even Jace was making abort mission signs with his hands, but Magnus had honestly no clue of what was going on. “Oh, me and Izzy knocked him unconscious earlier and-”

“YOU DID WHAT.” Ah, here was the Alec they all loved and missed. He was staring at the entire room like it was filled with complete idiots. “What do you mean, you _knocked Raj unconscious.”_

Magnus frowned. “He threatened to-”

Alec shook his head, interrupting him. “Raj is all talk. You know that Izzy! He would have never done anything he said he was going to do.”

Izzy crossed her arms over her chest. “He was being rude to Magnus! That was uncalled for.”

Alec sniffed. “Raj has been nothing but supportive of me and Magnus since the beginning. He adores you almost more than he tolerates me. Everyday he’s like ‘Did you know Magnus did this? And he did that? I can’t believe you got to kiss him, you have all the luck’.” He rolled his eyes. “And Aline is even worse.”

Jace looked at him in surprise, while Clary stared in confusion. “Aline? Penhallow? You still talk to her?”

Izzy smirked. “Of course he does. Honestly, I’m surprised she didn’t fly over here the day of the wedding.” She glanced at her brother half apologetically. “I heard the phone call.”

Jace turned to explain to Clary. “Alec was best friends with Aline and Raj back when we were in Idris at the Academy. Shadowhunters Academy.”

“Alec had friends?”

The boy glared at her, picking up his phone. “So funny, Fray.” He took a look at his phone and grimaced. “Oh god. Raj told Aline on the groupchat.”

Jace arched his eyesbrows at the words groupchat, but Izzy was quick to snatch the phone away from her brother. “Izzy!” he called, but the girl was on the opposite side of the room, hiding behind Magnus with the phone in her hands.

“Heterophobicmalecfans changed their name to Alec you got some explaining to do.” She looked at her brother. “Heterophobic?”

“Heterophobia is real and alive. Straight people are dangerous.” He gave Clary a look, and the girl rolled her eyes.

“I’m a lesbian.”

Izzy smiled at her. “Nice.” Then she scrolled back to the texts. 

** GF Raj:  ** Can you believe the High Warlock of Brooklyn spent the entire day in Alec’s room.

** GF Aline:  ** wtf raj, he’s unconscious

** GF Raj:  ** that doesn’t make him any less good looking. I think its love

** GF Aline:  ** I thought aldetree was ur man

** GF Raj:  ** I do have my eye on him

** GF Aline:  ** how u gon say u love him then

** GF Raj:  ** bicc I got two eyes

** GF Aline:  ** then admire this

****

** GF Raj:  ** how do you straight

** GF Aline:  ** @alec wouldn’t know

** GF Raj:  ** @alec wake up ur boyfriend knocked me out and I wanna say thank you

** GF Aline:  ** if he dies I’ll kill him. He still hasn’t signed my copy of the #MalecKissVideo

** GF Raj:  ** wtf how did you get it maryse had them all deleted????

** GF Aline:  ** Izzy is cool like that, we should add her to the chat

** GF Raj:  ** you remember the Jace Dissertation? And the Lucian Graymark Discourse? The Dildo Argument??? Do you think Alec Lightwood, Salt Mine and dick enthusiast would ever let his sister read that

Izzy gave Alec a look. “The Dildo Argument?”

Jace pointed at himself. “You had a _dissertation_ about me?”

“A discourse on my dad?” asked Clary, horrified.

Alec hid his face in his hands, blushing. “Aline found the video Luuke did before becoming a cop? The videos for Old Spice? There was a lot of things we had to discuss about that. Can I have my phone- DON’T YOU DARE SCROLL UP!”

** GF Raj:  ** I’d lick whipped cream out of Magnus’ butthole tbh

** GF Alec:  ** wtf Raj, that’s my boyfriend

** GF Raj:  ** uhm, have you defined the relationship yet? Didn’t think so

** GF Alec:  ** I called dibs first ****

** GF Aline:  ** @raj same

** GF Alec:  ** if anyone is going to lick cream out of Magnus’ butthole ITS GOING TO BE ME

** GF Raj:  ** jfc Alec y u so nasty

** GF Aline:  ** always thinking about buttholes and whipped cream

** GF Raj:  ** so gay

** GF Alec:  ** yall so homophobic

** GF Aline:  ** how

** GF Alec:  ** cause im gay and youre being rude to me

** GF Aline:  ** he kissed Magnus Bane once

** GF Raj:  ** and he became gay

** GF Raj:  ** WOW Magnus Bane tru icon

** GF Alec:  ** remember when aldertree and raj kissed and it broke the shadow world news network- oh wait

** GF Aline:  ** lmao drag his ass

** GF ** **Raj:** remember when Lydia Branwell doesn’t even kno your name tho @aline

** GF Aline:  ** this is bullying

** GF Alec:  ** not even joking but if on my first date with m I try to-

Izzy dropped the phone so fast Magnus thought it had burned her. Magnus picked it up and read the last sentence before giving him back the phone, to an horrified Alec who was hiding. “If you did what you wrote, let’s just say I would not object.”

Clary was just staring at them mildly interested. “How do you apply to become a member of the chat?”

 

 


End file.
